Tag Archives: Intentionality

Sick of Somedays

How many times have you flopped on your train home and said “I can’t wait for this day to end?” You don’t mean it literally, of course. We’ve all uttered these words but do we mean it?

I’m typing this on my flight home from Houston after a work conference. A few hours ago, not too far from Houston, yet another school shooting occurred, another set of innocents lives taken for no reason. Unfortunately, these shootings aren’t new headlines, as it feels like some massive tragedy is almost a weekly occurrence. Lately, it’s not only mass shootings that have me thinking about morality in general and how truly fragile life is. I’ve heard of people being at work on Thursday and gone Friday. People with plenty of life left to live. Let me be clear, death is scary and upsetting regardless, but when high-schoolers are shot or a relatively healthy 30 year old dies, it makes you pause.

Everyday matters

From the book, “Where Will You Be in Five Years?” Highly recommend!

I’ve seen or heard too many of these examples lately. Sometimes, there’s no reason why. All of these too close to home scenarios have me reprioritizing. As I’ve confessed before, I’m your typical type-A planner, who obsesses over the details. These personality traits come in handy most days. But it can leave me with somedays instead of todays.

The obsession and anxiety can be so paralyzing that my couch is the only place I want to be. It’s doesn’t happen often because I’ve learned to recognize it, yet I still catch myself spinning or avoiding tasks. My guess is this won’t ever go away. However, the obsessing is slowing down. You hear these tragic stories that bring the cliché “life’s too short” to fruition. There’s only time stop and smell the roses if you make the time. When’s the last time you looked up at the sky? Or gazed at the stars? If that’s not your thing, find what is. And make time for it. I’m not saying go quit your job and backpack Europe (maybe!) but slow the hell down.

How you ask? I’m still figuring it out. Some days it’s simply working outside so I can feel the sunshine. Other days it’s spending over an hour on the phone with my mom. For the month of June, it will likely mean living out of boxes as I refused to give up my social life to move. It’s thinking bigger. No one is going to say, “Wow she created a fantastic spreadsheet” at your funeral. They’re going to talk about how you made them feel and the memories you created. Drastic example, I know. But, asking myself the question, “If you look back at your life, do you like what you see?” has made me be more intentional with my time.

I’m not saying don’t strive for more. I know I always will, it’s in my DNA. And some of Diane Ackermanthat striving brings me a euphoric high that I’ve never want to lose. Yet, I find myself being more resilient and letting go of things more frequently. Screwed up a communication at work? Let’s debrief it and move on. Didn’t exercise today? Ok, I’ll try again tomorrow. Had a horrible date? On to the next one! Life really is too short to waste precious energy on things that won’t matter in five minutes, let alone five years.

And even for the big things that do matter, if I can’t change the outcome, then it’s not worth my energy. It’s not worth wasting a minute of my life. Because it’s all mine and all yours. Not your parent’s or your spouse’s or your kids’ or your employer’s. It’s yours, stand up, own it and give up the somedays.

My R&R: Routines and Rituals

In last week’s post, I talked about how stuck I’ve been recently. One way I’ve be able to start taking baby steps forward is using the routines I previously had in place. They’re familiar, comfortable and have made each day easier. But why are routines and rituals so important?

Most of us have routines in place unintentionally. If you catch same train every day or brush your teeth before bed, you have an established routine. Those are unconscious decisions we’ve made for a while. The routines that are more important are the ones we intentionally decide to implement in our lives.

My friend and creator of more happy hours, Jullien Gordon was the person who got me thinking about intentional routines and rituals over two years ago. At the beginning of each year, Jullien creates his New Year Guide, which allows people to focus on goals in each area of their lives. He helps people dive deeper in how they’ll achieve the goal, what obstacles they’ll face and how to implement more consistent routines in their lives.

RoutinesI just finished filling out my guide last night and was completely energized by it. There’s something about writing down aspirations for the future and your plan for achieving them that excites me. During this process, I was reminded of how chosen routines will help me along. For example, I’m running (hopefully not trotting) Mudderella this summer with my super talented runner friend. I’m totally intimidated and know training more regularly is a must. So I thought about what I could intentionally do to ensure I stick to a training plan. Some of my thoughts included:

  • Telling as many people as possible about the race. These people then will help to hold me accountable and will hopefully check in to see how I’m progressing
  • Starting smart and pacing myself. I’m not going to be able to run five miles immediately. It’s more about setting realistic goals, like running for 30 minutes twice a week and gradually increasing from there
  • Thinking about the big picture. So it’s not just about running since there are obstacles included in this race. Eating better and meal prepping will help; so will strength training. One routine I wanted to start that’s been a struggle is doing a bit of strength training in the morning before I get ready for work. No matter what I tell myself or how early I set my alarm, I haven’t been able to jump start this one. Any ideas you have to help are appreciated.

You can apply my tips listed above to implementing any new routine. You also shouldn’t try to create a bunch of new routines at once. You’re going to be so focused on getting each one perfected that they won’t stick. Like with most everything else, it’s a balancing act. Give yourself permission to mess up a routine once in a while. Getting frustrated isn’t going to help.

Ultimately, routines and rituals energize you and help create consistently across all aspects of your life. Believing in and harnessing their power will absolutely help you achieve your goals. Share some of your favorite routines or rituals on the comments section!

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