Tag Archives: Marriage

Love & Other Drugs

Social media was flooded with two types of posts this past Saturday: people believing in love and people jaded by love. On one side, there were pictures of flowers, chocolates and jewelry. On the other side, cynical quotes tagged with #singlesawarenessday. So many emotions, so little characters, all for one day!

Valentine’s Day doesn’t phase me; it’s just another day on the calendar. If you’re not in a relationship, then maybe you should focus on the good relationships you do have – your parents, siblings, extended family and friends. Most think of love in terms of a romance, with a significant other. But there’s so many other types of love out there, why limit Valentine’s Day to a celebration of just romantic love?

SATCOne observation: most millennials are good about broadening this definition of love. Generally speaking, we’re not a generation hyper-focused on getting married and having babies. I’m not going to pretend that I know why or that I’ve done research that shows why. My best guesses are we’re more focused on bettering ourselves, finding a career that makes us happy versus makes us money and giving back. Also, we saw how our parents did it and might not want that for ourselves. Or maybe Carrie Bradshaw did have it right, that our girlfriends are the true loves of our lives.

I don’t want to generalize and say all millennials are waiting to get married or have babies. That’s not the truth. What I am saying is that there’s something about the 20 something female that is different in this generation versus past ones. The dating game has changed with the advent of Match.com, Tinder and the like. Also, the ability to Google anyone and anything might hurt our cause versus help it. Maybe technology has helped us create this barrier, this layer of protection, so we can somewhat hide behind a computer or phone screen. It makes us less vulnerable.

I’ll admit dating does intimidate me. I don’t like to be vulnerable and put myself out there. But, as the real lovesaying goes, no risk, no reward. I waver between understanding that statement and wondering if real, true love is sought after. If it’s meant to be, won’t it find a way? Or should I be searching for it on the Internet? I don’t have an answer yet but I do know I’ll figure it out in my own way on my own time.

Either way, however you look at it, wherever you are in the dating game, have an open mind and heart. I’m going to try and suggest you do that same. You know I want to hear your thoughts on this topic! Share away!

Motivation Mondays: Love Never Fails

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. . .And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-13

I am nowhere near religious, but I did grown up Catholic. From 7-12th grade, I went to Catholic school, attended church regularly and made all of my sacraments. While I should absolutely go to church more, I do believe in a higher power who has a plan for each of us. Recently, I was in church to witness my good friend’s wedding. It was not only beautiful but a moving experience.

Tori and I have been friends for three years now and I was honored to be a part of her special day. I was excited to help plan the wedding andeven more trilled to watch her marry her best friend. I have been to weddings before but for some reason, I felt completely different when this wedding was over. It moved me to tears and restored my faith in love and marriage.

Tori & I with another friend

Tori & I with another friend

I will be the first to admit that I’m a guarded person when it comes to relationships. It’s just my nature; I know I have to work on it. Having divorced parents also does not help the cause. Please note, I do not blame my parents in any way, shape or form. They have done a great job raising us and I would not have my life any other way. That being said, there are tons of psychological studies that show people with divorced parents are just wired differently. I must admit, it makes sense to me. When you don’t have a living, breathing example of marriage in front of you as a child, what are you supposed to think or feel?

Happy couple

Happy couple

However, watching two young adults profess their love for one another and promise to spend their lives together suddenly made a light bulb go off in my head. It should not matter what your circumstances were growing up. The fact is everyone is an adult and should make more of their situation, good or bad. One day, I’ll know when it will be right to get married and will have faith that it will last.

I am not going to say love never fails. People change, circumstances become different and life gets in the way. Everyone must give it their best shot. That’s the whole point of getting married anyway: to commit yourself to one person forever no matter what. That’s a pretty big deal. I am so lucky that I got to be a part of Tori and Byron’s wedding and know it made an impact on me. Sometimes with a little faith, one event can totally change your perspective. Let it!

 

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